Confidence can be easy to come by for some people, but for others, not so much.
If your partner has a generous helping of esteem issues, it’s important to make some adjustments in your behaviour to help them overcome this mental hurdle. It’s equally important to be gentle and loving in your approach.
As their partner, you play a major role in influencing your significant other’s self-esteem. Every action you do—regardless of whether it’s big or small—can either contribute to them having a more positive self-image or a negative one.
Naturally, it’s important to help them feel good about themselves. Leading your partner to a path to high self-esteem can do wonders for their mental health—as well as fortify the strength of your romantic bond.
You may then wonder: how can you help your partner gain that extra boost of confidence they so desperately need?
Look no further. In this article, we’ll explore seven easy and helpful ways to get your partner to feel more assured of themselves in their own skin.
Let’s jump right in!
1. Notice The Little Things
The first step you must do is to take note of all the little things your partner does. Taking note of these and bringing them up at appropriate times can make them feel extra special and deserving of love—which can help boost their confidence big time.
For instance, if your partner has made a passing mention of their favourite restaurant or flower, take note. When date night rolls around, you can “surprise” them with a visit to this restaurant or a bouquet of their favourite flower.
Noticing these little things shows that you’re listening and truly paying attention to your partner’s individuality. This can make them feel noticed and understood, thus making it easier for them to gain that boost of confidence.
Besides memorising their favourite things, you should also bring up the easy-to-overlook behaviours they often do in a positive light. For instance, you can bring up how you love how they crinkle their nose when they’re annoyed, or how you love their ability to organise an exciting date night every time you go out.
By noticing these things and bringing them up, you’ll be showing your partner a form of love that’s unique to the two of you—thus helping deepen the relationship and increasing their feeling of security and confidence with you as their partner,
2. Support Their Self-Care and Appearance Goals
Self-esteem is often closely tied to how we feel about our physical appearance. If your partner has expressed a desire to improve or change aspects of their appearance, it’s crucial to support them in a kind and non-judgmental way.
Start by engaging in open and empathetic conversations about their goals. Whether they want to adopt a new skincare routine, update their wardrobe, or get in shape, your role is to be encouraging, not critical. Offer to join them in these self-improvement efforts—perhaps by going to the gym together, shopping for clothes that make them feel confident, or even setting up a home spa night for skincare.
If they’re dealing with specific concerns like hair loss, you could suggest exploring options together, such as visiting a hair transplant clinic in Sydney or consulting a dermatologist. Just be careful not to make them feel pressured; let them guide the pace and direction of their changes.
By being a loving supporter of your partner’s self-care and appearance goals, you can help boost their confidence and make them feel more comfortable in their own skin.
3. Support Their Dreams
Your partner most likely has a fair amount of goals, dreams, and aspirations under their wing. Even if you don’t completely understand them, it’s important to listen, understand, and show encouragement to them whenever they’re making moves or achieving milestones to further their goal progress.
Goals may be deeply personal—but knowing that your partner supports you in your pursuit can be a huge boost in one’s confidence. It’s infinitely better than having a partner shut down your dreams and ambitions, which can be confidence-shattering.
There are many ways you can show your support. For one, you can simply listen in and show genuine interest in their goal and their progress towards it. You can also act as a sounding board to help them align their actions to the overall mission. You may also give them advice if you’re fairly familiar with the matter.
In any case, showing your support can be a great way to encourage your S/O to push through with their dreams, which can lead to a fulfilling and spirited romantic and personal life.
4. Respect Their Independence
Another way to get your partner to feel more confident is by giving them the space to do their own thing at times.
There will be fundamental differences in one’s career, social life, and hobbies that can’t exactly be stopped the moment someone finds themselves in a relationship.
These things are still important to your partner, and if you want them to fully trust and find security in your relationship, then you should allow them to partake in these activities on their own without you having to constantly glance over your shoulder.
If you micromanage your partner in every action, they may feel heavily restricted in what they can and cannot do, which can diminish their self-worth and make them feel as if they’re walking on eggshells.
In contrast, by practising independence and giving each other healthy amounts of space, you can both grow individually. In turn, this can help you appreciate time alone and with each other, all with the assurance that there’s love to be found in both instances.
5. Be Consistent
Being in a healthy relationship isn’t about the thrill of the chase and story arcs with twists and turns. It’s about seeing your partner as a home to return to after a long day, a solid anchor on stable ground.
Consistency is the value that glues relationships together. A person who’s consistent is one that’s dependable, trustworthy, and with high levels of integrity. It shows that you’re a person of your word—which is an excellent trait to have.
Being a mysterious and vague person to your partner, on the other hand, can make them feel like you’re hiding a secret, which can naturally make them suspicious of you.
On the contrary, being consistent and open allows them to be themselves around you. You can act as their safe space, empowering and assuring them that you can be counted on in any circumstance.
A high level of consistency in your words and actions can make partners feel more at ease with you and your intentions. This can naturally make them feel confident and safe knowing that you won’t do something completely uncalled for.
6. Model Confidence Yourself
It’s crucial for people to be confident if they want to have confident partners themselves. This doesn’t mean you have to be arrogant, but you should have a clear plan of action and a sense of determination in things that you set out to do—whether it’s a career or a personal project.
Demonstrating personal confidence can be attractive to your partner. They can also easily absorb this positive value from you if you showcase it in all the things you do.
Besides having personal confidence, it’s also important to be comfortable with the relationship as well, especially if it’s truly loving and healthy.
No one wants to be in a relationship with someone who’s suspicious of you whenever you’re not in their sight. If you constantly have that sense of dread and paranoia, it’s best to work on fixing that mindset, especially if it’s unfounded.
7. Play to Their Love Language
It’s important to know your partner’s preferred love language, whether it’s words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch, or receiving gifts.
Honouring your partner’s love language is an easy way to make them feel genuinely loved and admired by you.
By utilising their love language during the right times, you can make them feel extra appreciated and loved. This can be a huge boost in their confidence—both personal and for the relationship.
One way of demonstrating love language utilisation is by complimenting your partner after winning a football game or getting a good job offer, particularly for people whose primary love language is words of affirmation.
If your partner’s love language is quality time, then you can spend weekly dates with them as a start. You can also plan out long dates during the weekends for both of you to anticipate.
By using their primary love language to show love, you can make your partner feel confident in your relationship. And this sense of love and security can transfer over to general feelings of confidence.
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